Snob Essentials

By Malene Birger Hauda Metal Armouring: What’s in Your Wallet

By_Marlene_Birger_Huada_metal_armouring.jpgBy_Marlene_Birger_Huada_metal_armouring1.jpg

I’m intrigued by this. Would I wear this bag? Not unless I was headed to a fencing party wearing my armored dress and matching hat, but I think that would be overdoing it.

I’m not saying By Malene Birger Hauda metal armouring bag isn’t creative, because hey, I am all into different textures and materials, it’s that I don’t want everyone seeing what’s in my bag. It’s like shouting, “Hey! Tonight I’m carrying my Visa, red MAC lipstick, $80 and a tampon! See?!”

Now unless I’m carrying a weapon into a dangerous part of town so people know not to mess with me, I don’t want people to see what’s in my goody bag. That’s sacred territory. I’ve known this since I was 5 and was caught red handed pawing through my mom’s purse chewing entire packs of gum up and playing with her credit cards. She explained to me that a woman’s purse is like her underwear drawer and you don’t just go rummaging through it without asking. She also then told me I would be getting a bull cut because I had a wad of Big Red in my hair. I learned very valuable lessons that day; don’t climb into peoples purses without asking and if your wad of 10 pieces of gum falls out of your mouth and you can’t find it stay perfectly still and scream for help.

Paws (and eyes) off the bag, please. I’m just not feeling this one. Plus the brown leather with the metal is just weird. If anything it should be black, but I don’t see anything saving this little spy guy.

What do you guys think?

Shopbop for $170

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4 comments

  1. I don’t like it and I don’t get it. The strap, especially – it looks like a cheap crafty bag that a kid would make with paper clips or something. Why wouldn’t the strap also be metal? Anyway, I would not wear it either.

  2. I think if I wore this I would start craving a pint of mead. I’d want to wear a metal helmet with horns on it. Then I’d climb into my Viking ship wearing a belted tunic made of raw cotton, throw on this purse filled with coin I forged me-self, and set sail for the New World.