I’ve been fighting the secret urge to buy these insane shoes and I’ve finally caved! I won’t, however, be wearing them shopping or to run errands in (I don’t hate my feet quite that much). They’re special shoes for special occasions. Yes, they’re slightly tranny and border on clown-hooker territory, and yes, every last member of the Kardashian family has at least five pairs, but if worn with the right thing (say a very long dress or some high waisted, wide-legged trousers), they can definitely work. Need more proof? Look no further than Sofia Vergara. I mean, she can wear anything, so I don’t know if this is really helpful, but just go with it! Even Beyonce and Jennifer Hudson somehow managed to make the shoes look good with higher hemlines. I guess that’s the power of a superstar. If you’re excited to take the plunge, I say go all in and buy the hand painted patchwork watersnake ($1,295) like I did or the crystaled Daffodile Strass ($6,395). But for those of you just dipping your toes in the water, there’s always black patent. Available at Christian Louboutin for $909.