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Fashion Don’ts That Make You Crazy

CARNIVALE OF COUTURE #2

Inappropriate Gold Digging Attire

When did “cocktail attire” mean 7 jeans? Jeans with a lingerie tank top is NOT the new LBD. Middle aged women with saggy arms and paunchy stomachs wearing tight jeans and lacy camisoles to cocktail parties and formal dinners make me want to gag. The OC has inspired mothers around the country to dress like their 15-year-olds, and it is not a pretty sight. As Oscar de La Renta said, there is no true style or fashion out there anymore. Remember, denim was invented for gold diggers in the wild west, apparently modern gold diggers have embraced it as their uniform as well.

Underwear as Accessory

Don’t have your underwear or g-strings hangin’ out of the top of your jeans. It’s tasteless and trashy, even if you are 18 and hot. And if you wear those thong embellishments you dangle over the jeans, you should be dancing at Ba-da-bing.

Hello!! You’re Wearing Your Entire Closet

I saw a girl wearing a Victorian blouse with a bohemian skirt, slouchy boots, an arm full of Indian bangles, a giant Moroccan belt, and gypsy hair. Oh yeah, it was Sienna Miller. She looked schizo. One trend at a time, please!!

These Boots Are Made For Dim Wits

Cowboy boots with mini skirts, prairie dresses, or shorts is just dumb, even for Jessica Simpson. And Nicole Richie. And Lindsay Lohan. And especially Mischa Barton ‘cuz moccasin boots are even dumber.

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